Strutt into the lawn tennis club like the original Don with a pair of comfortable SMO sneakers.  With a pair of tastefully emblazoned white ass-kickers on your feet, no one will date hustle you about what school your kid goes to or hopefully even dare speak to you unless they have a 100x under their hat they gonna split with you and your homies. 
On your way to the bar for the post tennis Martini you can use these beauties to kick your equity portfolio manager in the crotch for giving you lacklustre returns all these years whilst you were slaving your shirt off.  Now who's the daddy huh?
.: Made of 25.71 oz. Nylon canvas
.: 6-14 US sizes
.: Lightweight
.: Durable rubber outsole
.: Black inside interior
.: Runs smaller than usual, suggested to size up or buy some SMO socks to make ya feet even bigger!